Today’s generation of Pinterest-pinning, viral-video-viewing, and hashtag-hyped social posting couples often feel the pressure to create Instagram-worthy moments for all who attend. This means tried and true traditions have given way to new normals that many guests may not recognize.
“Everything seems to be more casual and not following the old rules of etiquette,” explains Jacx Ramos, owner of Center Street Grill in New Town.
Mickey Chohany, owner of Second Street Bistro, another hot spot for wedding events, is also seeing non-traditional arrangements take center stage.
“Rehearsal dinners are still in vogue, however, we are noticing that destination weddings, such as Williamsburg, are turning ceremonies into mini vacations,” he said. For guests, this might mean pre-planning to take time off from work, or hiring a sitter for the kids.
“For some weddings, guests will need to skip work on Thursday for the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner, attend the wedding on Friday, do something around town on Saturday and on Sunday, then travel back home. That’s what we are seeing”said Chohany.
Brittany Rice, Director of Wedding and Social Catering Sales for Colonial Williamsburg, agrees. “Destination weddings are more and more popular. Couples like the idea of having their guests experience a wedding weekend away rather than just a single event.” She is seeing rehearsal dinners being replaced with more lively celebrations.
“A trend emerging is for couples to have large welcome parties for their out-of-town guests,” said Rice. Waypoint Grill manager Howard Saunders agrees, with more couples choosing to have more people attend and serve stand up hors d’oeuvres and cocktails.
“I think they want to include more people and have a good time. We serve a lot of smaller sized portions so people can socialize,” he said. One of those dishes is Waypoint oysters, baked with crab, ham and hollandaise sauce. The restaurant’s food truck, Prost! recently drove to a rehearsal dinner at a church hall to serve German food like brats and schnitzel and pommes frites.
Couples are putting their personal stamp on their event in other ways such as by creating signature cocktails, after party food stations, and nods to their alma maters via color schemes and wedding favors.
Arlene Aitken, owner of Morrison’s Florist said guests should be prepared for all things green. “In 2017, thePantone color of the year was green. Since then, we've prepared numerous floral designs focusing on greens withflowers as accents,” she said. Guests might expect to take home succulents in small terra cotta pots or glass votives, rather than sugared almonds or matchbooks.
What to Wear
If you want to be the best dressed guest at the wedding, consider a luxury fashion rental company like Rent the Runway, Le Tote or Girl Meets Dress. These services allow customers to rent a dress at a fraction of the cost of owning it. After you wear it for your special occasion, then you return it.
A look at the websites shows hundreds of beautiful options for fall including rich velvet and flirty florals, midi dresses in colors ranging from chiffon yellow to powder pinks and blues. "Services like Rent the Runway are excellent solutions to choosing a dress that you may not ever wear again. The prices are reasonable, you can experiment with designer styles you may not wish to commit to paying full price for, and most styles are shown with consumer recommendations and photos so you can get an idea of how the dress might look on someone of your size and body shape,” said Style Capital’s Suzanne Douglas.
Williamsburg resident Tiffany GrifanaRichardson used Rent the Runway for her sister’s bachelorette weekend and found the process to be a time and money saver.
“It was so easy. They let you select two sizes, and they also let you select an alternative in case the dress you pickis unavailable.” She said the dress arrived on time and fit perfectly. “The best part was it came with the return label and I just dropped it off at the post office for return.”
Remember that the dress should match the tone of the wedding, so look for cues in the invitation about the theme and level of formality.
Douglas notes that with so many "themed" weddings these days, guests should consider the wedding venue as well as the formality of the occasion. “For example, I recently styled someone for a ‘barn’ wedding. It was formal, but a classic cocktail dress and heels would have been out of place, notto mention uncomfortable. We went with a flowy, 3/4 length chiffon dress in a paisley print that could be paired with either strappy sandals or cowboy boots, depending how far the client wanted to go with echoing the theme.”
Although many dress lengths can work for female wedding guests, pants are still generally reserved forthe gentlemen. For everyone, Douglas recommends comfortable shoes.
“You'll be dancing and standing and greeting people, and you really don't want to be in pain! Nowadays, there are more comfortable dress shoes on offer than ever.”