
Photos courtesy of Luke and Ashley Photography
When the doors swung open for Nadina Milburn to walk down the aisle, the 3-year-old flower girl froze. Her stepfather, Jason, hopped from his seat and escorted Nadina down the aisle, tossing flower pedals from her basket until she reached the altar. Her mother, Leslie Gregoire, recalls her daughter as being nervous.
I get it. I carried the fluffy pillow twice down the aisle as a ring bearer—once in 1982 at my mother's wedding and again the following year at my Uncle Mike’s wedding. Both in May, both outdoors and both hot, according to my mother and uncle. They said I was a natural who discharged the duties of his role without a hiccup.
As my mother, uncle and Leslie attested, having children take part in weddings isn't hard though planning or improvising for a deer in headlights reaction is advisable. But for families electing to bring children to a wedding, preparation is everything.
First, going to a wedding isn’t the same as taking your child to story time at the public library or Mommy & Meat Chick-fil-A. A crying or energetic child can create disruptions duringthe ceremony and fluster an already nervous wedding couple.
If your child is in the wedding, make sure they get proper rest the night before. When children are sleep deficient, their behavior rapidly deteriorates which can lead to them becoming a distraction. One thought to keep in mind is to have a babysitter at the ready. Once your child has fulfilled his or her obligations to the wedding (be it ring bearer or flower girl), arrange for a drop off between the ceremony and reception or a pickup by the babysitter during the same timeframe.
When it comes to food, pack snacks for your children. Wedding food is typically geared for an adult's palate and you don’t want to deprive othersof food that your children will pickover or not eat at all. Be sure to bring entertainment for them. If they have iPads or other electronics, allow them to play games or watch movies (or YouTube Kids). This settles down the ‘antsiest’ of children.
Take child-minding shifts with your spouse. If you each want to mingle and have fun, take turns keeping an eye on the kids so that the other can focus their undivided attention on enjoying conversation, talking to members of the wedding party, or having fun on the dance floor.
Be sure to enjoy the moment. Weddings are great teaching opportunities for children. They get to learn about love, friendship, etiquette and manners. They also get to have fun when the DJ gets the music started. Let them enjoy dancing, taking pictures in the photo booth, and entertaining.
During her cousin's wedding reception, Leslie, Jason and Nadina sat with friends at a table near the bar. As they snacked on hors d'oeuvres, the waitresses approached the table for drink orders. When she got to Nadina, the once nervous flower girl made a shocking request, “I’ll have a beer, please,” she told the server. Laughter erupted from the table. For the rest of the evening, she was the darling of the wait staff who frequented the table to make sure that Nadina had whatever she wanted and was satisfied.
Kids.
Since age of 4, Chris has appeared in eight weddings with roles ranging from ring bearer to groom. He’s happy to be in yours if you ask. Just don’t ask him to bring or include his kids.